WHAT ARE SOCIAL SKILLS

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Jessica A. Slimmer Promoting Life-Long Social Skills in a Pre-Kindergarten Classroom Table of Contents Abstract

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Timeline

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Statement of the Problem

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Situating the Problem

5

Literature Review

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Methods

11

Participants

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Data Collection

11

Data Analysis

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Intervention

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Findings

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Conclusions

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Future Implications

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References

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Appendix A Appendix B Appendix C

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Abstract Each year, I meet and teach a fresh class of wonderful pre-school age children. As can be expected, these children often possess limited social skills. In previous years, I always handled the task of teaching social skills when a conflict arose. However, the year that this study was conducted, I became proactive rather than reactive. Using literature, videos and puppetry, I taught eight mini-lessons over a four-week period. The goal was to give my students the necessary tools in which to engage in social experiences. A group of 20 children comprised the study population, 9 boys and 11 girls. The study site was located in a Pre-K-2nd school in an urban community. Students came from low to middle income families. Prior to the mini-lesson intervention, I assessed classroom behavior using a Social Behavior Scale. The social behaviors assessed where sharing, negative words and phrases, aggressive behavior, and exclusion. Using the same Social Behavior Scale, I conducted a post-assessment. Analysis of pre- and post-assessment data documented a dramatic decrease in the number of social conflicts needing adult intervention. Additionally, since the intervention I have experienced fewer interruptions and have had more time to spend teaching.

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Timeline for Action Research July 2. 3. 4. 5.

Attended one week action research class Brainstormed topics in my classroom to research Narrowed the topics down to one Began looking for literature to support my topic

August • Looked for literature in books and pamphlets to support my topic • Wrote Statement of the Problem • Wrote Situating the Problem • Wrote Literature Review September • Revised and edited Statement of the Problem, Situating the Problem and Literature Review October • Conducted Pre-Assessment • Began Intervention—Sharing, Aggressive Behavior • Met with Dr. Hankes to discuss draft of the three sections completed November • Continued Intervention—Negative Words and Phrases and Exclusion • Conducted Post-Assessment • Began writing the Methods section of Action Research Paper December • Began working on Intervention Section of Action Research Paper January • Continued to work on Intervention section of Action Research Paper February • Met with Dr. Hankes for revising and editing • Continued to work on Intervention section of Action Research Paper • Wrote Results and Findings sections March • Edited and revised Methods and Intervention section • Wrote Conclusion and Future Implications April • Edited and revised entire paper

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• • • •

Added appendices Wrote Abstract, Timeline and Table of Contents Final meeting with Dr. Hankes Gave paper to 2nd reader (Stacy Knapp)

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STATEMENT OF THE PROBLEM I have taught four-year-old kindergarten for the past three years. During this time, I have observed that many four year olds possess limited social skills. Hitting, refusing to share, and saying unkind words are common behaviors of this age group. In the past, I addressed negative behaviors when the situations arose. However, the year that this study was conducted, I decided to be proactive rather than reactive. The following questions focused my study. How can I help my preschool children develop social skills sooner rather than later? SITUATING THE PROBLEM I have been teaching Pre-Kindergarten (also known as four-year-old kindergarten) for three years and am currently in my fourth year. The year the study was conducted, I taught two half-day sessions with the help of an aid. I had a total of thirty-eight children. The study site was located in a Pre-K-2nd school in an urban community. Students came from low to middle income families. Students in the studied population came to me with a variety of social experiences and varying developmental abilities. Some children had been in a daycare setting while others had stayed at home with a parent for the first four years of their lives. Consequently, each child possessed different social skills. Positive behaviors that are possessed by this age level include: being inquisitive, eager to be included, a passion for learning new things, and wanting to please their teachers. However, there are negative behaviors I have encountered with this age group and they include: children taking toys from one another, hitting, throwing toys, teasing, name calling, bullying, non-developed problem solving skills, etc.

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Our Pre-Kindergarten curriculum is based on developing and enhancing social skills. This is a time for children to learn how to communicate and begin to work cooperatively with their peers. Prior to the study year, I typically discussed the social expectations in the classroom at the beginning of the year. In the past, when social problems arose, I discussed the situations with the students involved. Additionally, to draw upon the teachable moment, I modeled problem-solving skills for the whole class. For example: If a child hit another child, I would first resolve the issue between the parties involved. When our playtime was over, I would gather the class as a group and my paraprofessional and I would role-play a situation like the one we just encountered. We would then hold a discussion and ask them if they knew other strategies we could use to solve our problems instead of using our hands. I would also give them a few suggestions they may not have thought of. After teaching in this manner for three year, I observed that many of the problematic social behaviors that I dealt with were the same each year. I also observed that solving problems as they arose took time away from working on academic topics such as counting, patterning, and early literacy skills. I realized that I wanted to be proactive rather than reactive when helping my students develop positive social skills. My first step in achieving this goal was to conduct a review of literature to determine whether other early childhood educators experienced similar problems and if there was any research providing suggestions for resolving these problems.

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REVIEW OF LITERATURE What Are Social Skills? Social skills are skills every person needs to possess in order to relate to others. Developing these skills starts at and early age. Social competence, defined as the ability to initiate and maintain satisfying relationships, should be developed by age seven according to Knight and Hughes (1995). Skills that children should acquire include, but are not limited to, discussing, compromising, negotiating, stating feelings and desires, articulating preferences, articulating reasons for making good choices or decisions, cooperating, turn taking, asserting themselves, empathizing with others, and gaining access to and interacting with their peers (Knight & Hughes, 1995). It is highly recommended that all children be introduced to each of these skills throughout their early educational years. It has been suggested that teachers include the following social skills during instruction: sharing materials and toys, initiating positive interactions with peers, assisting peers, positively responding to peer initiations, clearly communicating needs and wants appropriately, ongoing interactions with peers, expressing anger in an appropriate manner, taking turns, playing cooperatively, demonstrating and receiving affection, organizing play activities, refusing initiations appropriately, and engaging in “rough and tumble” play (Conroy, Langenbrunner & Burleson, 1996). Who Promotes Social Skills Teachers and families have a strong influence on a child’s emotional well-being. This influence impacts the child’s self-esteem and ultimately on the child’s behavior. A child’s self-esteem comes primarily from those around him. A child who misbehaves often has poor self-esteem, or unacknowledged needs. Knowing that others see us as significant and worthy also influences self-esteem (Nunnelley, 2002).

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The person with the most influence and the greatest impact on a child’s social competence is the mother. She tends to have more one-on-one contact with her child and is typically the disciplinarian. She is also usually the most supportive in her child’s endeavors (Knight and Hughes, 1995). The father does play a role in his child’s social development, but it tends to be more complimentary to the mother’s role unless he is the primary caregiver. “Parental attitudes and behaviors shape the way a parent interacts with the child (i.e. their style of parenting)” (Knights & Hughes, 1995). A consistent theme throughout the literature deems that children who are considered socially competent have parents who are warm, communicative, and have good control over their child’s behaviors. Siblings also affect the child’s social competence. They can take on the role of a teacher. Siblings also model social behaviors and practice social skills with each other (Knight & Hughes, 1995). According to Kristine Mielke, a colleague who has been a teacher for eleven years, siblings tend to have many of the same traits. She suggests that siblings who come from the same home tend to have the same strengths and weaknesses in social interactions. She believes it is due to the parenting style the siblings have been exposed to. Teachers and caregivers have a very high influential impact on children’s social competence. In today’s society, they often become surrogate parents. Early childhood/early elementary teachers need to give children many opportunities and guidance to promote and engrain social competence skills. The development of social skills is especially important prior to age seven since by that age the child’s sociometric

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status (their popularity) has been established (Knight & Hughes, 1995). The role of the teacher is critical at this time in the child’s life. Teachers must be conscientious when talking to students, making sure they are giving the same treatment to each child. All children want to be loved and respected. Even the ones that make the day a little tiring. Teachers and parents are culprits of giving more positive attention to the well-mannered, well-behaved, cute child than to those deemed as troublemakers who need I the most (Nunnelley, 2002). How do Teachers Promote Social Skills in the Classroom? As stated above, the role of the teacher is especially critical during the early stages of social development. Some ways in which teachers can promote social competence within the classroom include: allowing the children as many choices as possible, always enhancing self-esteem, establishing boundaries, and involving the children’s thoughts and ideas (Nunnelley, 2002). Allowing children to have choices will help the development of self-discipline. Making sure there are many options for children to choose from during their play time will allow them to have the power to make decisions which creates a learning environment (Conroy, Davis, Fox & Brown, 2002). An example of this includes creating different, clearly defined play areas in the classroom assigning a specific number of children to play in each area. Areas that may be incorporated into the classroom include a writing area, a block area, a dramatic play area, an art area, a fine motor area, a book area and a flannel board area. Children need to have boundaries that are clearly defined. They need to be aware of the consequences and held accountable for their actions. If a child makes a poor

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choice, he/she should know that there is a consistent consequence for making that poor choice. The consequence should be meaningful so the child understands that what he/she did was not socially acceptable (Conroy, Davis, Fox and Brown, 2002). Children enjoy being asked their opinions. For children over three, it is very important to include their thoughts and ideas when developing classroom rules and expectations. This provides ownership and allows children to be actively involved which provides a sense of community (Nunnelley, 2002). Initially, it may take 10-15 minutes a day to discuss the expectations for appropriate behavior. Children should be part of this process with the teacher being there to guide them through this process (Knight & Hughes, 1995). Never take for granted that children have the necessary skills to play effectively with others, to be popular with other children, to share, or to make their wants known in a constructive way just as you should never assume they know their colors or specific skills, such as scissors. First you observe and then you teach them through play situations. It should be the same for the social competency skills, which applies either at home or at school (Nunnelley, 2002).

In summary, developing and acquiring social competence is a long process that requires many opportunities and situations in which to practice social skills. Teachers have a direct impact on a child’s social competence. Allowing children to have time to interact with one another and have choices will allow for the opportunities to practice social skills in a controlled environment. Obtaining social competence will provide the foundation for children to be successful throughout their daily lives now and in the future. Putting this into practice is a challenge. The following intervention describes my efforts to accomplish this.

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METHODS Participants Twenty Pre-K children, students from my morning class, participated in this study. There were 9 boys and 11 girls, each with varying social skills. I implemented the intervention with the morning group because the children in this group displayed many challenging behaviors, testing my paraprofessional and myself daily. Data Collection In order to assess my student’s social skills and the impact of the intervention, I pre and post tested students using a tally recording method. Prior to beginning the study, I identified four categories encompassing social interaction problems. The four categories were: negative phrases, aggressive behavior, exclusion, and sharing difficulties. Using these categories, I developed an instrument entitled Social Behavior Recording Sheet (appendix A). To establish a behavior baseline, my paraprofessional and I, recorded each time we observed an inappropriate social interaction on the Social Behavior Recording Sheet (appendix B). The baseline data was collected over a four-day period in October. At the end of the four-week intervention period, students were assessed with the Social Behavior Recording Sheet (appendix C). Additionally, throughout the four week intervention, I journaled observations when changes in the children’s social skills occurred. Data Analysis The pre and post interventions were compared following completion of the intervention period. The scores for each category were converted to percentages and

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pre/post intervention percentages were compared. Field notes were also analyzed and categorized using the Social Behavior Recording Sheet. INTERVENTION The intervention was comprised of eight half-hour social skills lessons that were distributed over a four-week period, two lessons weekly. Following is a brief description of each lesson. Lesson #1 Sharing (October 21) After focusing attention with movement and listening activities (stretching, rhythm songs, Simon Says, etc.), I led a discussion on the importance of sharing. “You are going to learn how important it is to be nice to your family and friends.” I emphasized. I posed the question, “What does it mean to share?” A few responses included, “It means to give toys to your friends when they ask.” “Sharing is when you ask nicely for something you want.” “You are nice when you share.” These were great answers, however, the goal for this lesson was to give my students strategies to help them solve conflicts when sharing issues occur. After the discussion, the children watched a section from a video series entitled “Getting Along.” The video section for this lesson was “It’s mine!” Using child actors this video series introduced social situations children may encounter throughout their daily lives. Through this video, the children were exposed to three main strategies to use when sharing problems occur. When the video concluded, using chart paper, we listed the strategies learned. They included: 1. If someone is playing with something you want, using your manners, ask for it.

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2. If someone does not want to share an item, walk away and come back another time to see if the item is available. 3. Take turns. With the assistance of my paraprofessional, modeling these three strategies concluded this lesson. We role-played each strategy, pausing in the middle of the social conflict and asking, “What could you do if this happened to you?” The children gave a sharing strategy they learned from the video to resolve the conflict.

Lesson #2 Sharing (October 23) After gaining the children’s attention, I reviewed the sharing topic and then introduced the new lesson. This lesson involved using a book to initiate a discussion on sharing strategies. The book was entitled It’s my turn! (Bedford & Field, 2001). In summary, the story is about two friends who do not take turns with playground equipment. When one friend sits on the seesaw, she realizes she needs her friend to help make it work and from then on they play together, taking turns. When the reading was complete, the discussion was led back to the three strategies previously learned (see Lesson #1). The children voiced strategies that Tilly and Oscar, characters in the story, could have used to solve their sharing dilemmas. Lesson #3 Aggressive Behavior (October 28) The third lesson again involved role-playing. In the middle of gaining the students’ attention with a song, I pushed my paraprofessional (we collaborated on this beforehand). “You’re not singing the song right,” I shouted. The children were extremely baffled. I quickly explained to the children that my actions were planned and that I was pretending to be upset. This led into a discussion on aggressive behaviors with the main focus being hitting and pushing.

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Next, I introduced two puppet birds named Fred and Wilma. Using the puppets, three aggressive situations were modeled. Following is an example situation. Fred: Hey, Wilma! Look what I got. I finally got to play with the red truck. Wilma: Well, I wanted the red truck and I want it now!!!! Fred: You can have it when I’m done playing with it. Wilma: NO! I want it right now. Wilma then hits Fred and takes the toy away. Fred: Please don’t hit me. I don’t like it. I’m going to tell the teacher. “What should Fred have done after Wilma hit him?” I questioned. One of the answers given by a child was, “Fred should have told the teacher.” After modeling three situations, I proceeded to give them three simple strategies when dealing with aggressive behavior and they were: 1. Ask the person to please stop the behavior you do not like. 2. Walk away from the situation and play with someone else. 3.

Tell an adult.

After the lesson, I allowed the children to use the puppets for the rest of the week to simulate their own situations and practice using the three strategies to deal with aggressive behavior. Lesson #4 Aggressive Behavior (October 30) This lesson began by introducing a story entitled Hands Are Not for Hitting (Agassi, 2000). This story was very interactive and included many thought provoking discussion questions included. The book starts out with every day tasks that involve

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using our hands including hand shaking, waving, and writing. The book then moves into asking questions about hitting. A few sample questions include: 1. Why do people hit? 2. How does it feel when someone hits you? 3. Can you think of other ways to let you feelings out? The book concludes with more positive things our hands are used for. When asking the questions posed by the story, I stopped after each one to probe for children’s thoughts and opinions. The questions promoted great group discussions. At the end of the story, we listed ways in which we can use our hands in positive versus negative ways. Lesson #5 Negative Words and Phrases (November 4) This lesson promoted positive words to enhance my students’ self-esteem. The goal of this lesson was to encourage my students to say pleasant phrases to each other, for the purpose of building their self-esteem. After reading the article by Knights & Hughes (1995) about the teacher’s role in a child’s life, I wanted to find a creative way to promote “saying nice words” with my students. To accomplish this, I modeled a situation using the puppet birds, Fred and Wilma, once again. I found that the children really connected with the puppets and retained the information that they presented. Below is a sample situation: Fred: Hi, Wilma! How are you today? Wilma: I’m okay. I wanted to play with that red truck over there, but I have to wait my turn. Fred: Want to play with the blocks with me?

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Wilma: That sounds really stupid! I told you I wanted to play with that red truck! Fred: I’m sorry. I’ll go play with the blocks by myself. At the end of this scenario, I asked the children if Wilma used nice words. The reaction from all of the children was a simultaneous “no.” They knew that stupid was not a nice word. After using the puppets two more times, simulating similar yet different situations, we brainstormed nice things we could say to our friends to make them feel happy inside. And listed them on a piece of chart paper. A few of the answers included: “Say please and thank you.” “Tell someone they’re pretty.” “Tell someone you like their shoes.” “Never say stupid.” Before dismissing the children for the next activity, each child had to say something nice to one of his or her friends before being excused for free time. This brought out many smiles, especially to those children who do not often hear how wonderful they truly are. Lesson #6 Negative Words and Phrases (November 6) I followed lesson #5 with a story that reinforced the topic of using ‘nice words’. The story chosen for this lesson was Chrysanthemum (Henkes, 1991). This story is about a mouse named Chrysanthemum. She thought her name was the most beautiful name until classmates made fun of it. Throughout the story, I paused and asked the children questions such as: “Why did the children tease Chrysanthemum?” “Was teasing her a nice thing to do?”

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“What would you have done.” The children genuinely felt sorry for Chrysanthemum. In answering the last question, many of the children said they would be her friend and not make fun of her name. We then reviewed our list of nice things we could say to her to make her feel happy. Lesson #7 Exclusion(November 11) At the tender ages of four and five, children like to claim others as friends. One day, a child might identify someone as a ‘best friend’, however, the next this may no longer be true. I’ve noticed it usually depends on whether the ‘best friend’ is the ‘giver’ of some favor or thing. To start this lesson, I posed a question. “Do you like it when you have friends?” The unanimous response was, “Yes!” I asked them, “Why?” Their answers included: “Because then you have someone to play with.” “Because you can share your toys with them.” “I like friends because I can color with them.” “My friends like to sleep over at my house.” After brainstorming these ideas, I announced to the children that we would be viewing a short video like the one we saw on sharing only this time it would be about friendship. The section of this video was entitled, “Left Out (inclusion/exclusion).” In this section, two friends are playing with blocks and a child comes over and asks to join in only to be rejected by the other two. Right after this scenario, many of my children gasped, “That’s not nice!” I was extremely happy with this reaction. It informed me that they knew this was not how they would like to be treated.

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An adult then discussed with the child, how he felt when he could not play with the others. The child came up with a few solutions of his own including: crashing their block tower or asking a teacher to make the boys play with him. They talked about the negative impact these “solutions” may have. I stopped the video here because I wanted to see if my students could provide positive solutions on their own. I posed the question, “What could we do if someone does not want to play with us?” The children responded: “I could walk away and come back later to see if they want to play with me.” “If they wouldn’t let me play with them, I would just play near them and maybe they would let me play later.” “I would ask nicely if I could play with them one more time.” “I would just walk away because they weren’t being nice to me.” We wrote these down on a list and hung these on the cupboards by our colored carpet in order to refer to them if we had a situation pertaining to one of the four topics we discussed. This was the most visible spot in the room and a great visual reminder for the children. Lesson #8 Exclusion (November 13) Just like the previous lessons, I chose to read a story that discussed what it felt like to not be included. The story I chose was Chester’s Way (Henkes, 1988). This story is about two friends, Chester and Wilson, who love to do things the same way. When a new mouse, Lily, moves into the neighborhood and shows them they can do things a different way, Chester and Wilson are reluctant to try new these new things at first. They do not include Lily in their circle of friends until they realize they did have things in common.

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After the story, we discussed ways in which each of us are similar and different. By using a graph, I posed yes and no questions to allow the children to visually learn characteristics and behaviors about their friends. A few questions asked were: “Do you like the color yellow?” “Do you have any pets?” “Do you like to play at the park?” “Would you like to ride on a train?” “Do you walk to school?” After asking these questions, the children started asking their own questions, promoting great group discussion. They were able to get to know their friends better and find those friends with similar interests. FINDINGS After completing the four-week intervention in my Pre-K classroom, I noticed many changes. The most obvious change was that I had more time to interact with my children. I felt more confident that my children now had the tools to help them in social situations. I noticed most of the children resolving their own issues and only seeking my help if they were unable to resolve the conflict. At times, some of the children would walk up to the lists we made previously and “read” what was written. I kept the puppets out and the children continued to play with them, making up their own social conflict situations and using the tools given to them, to solve the problems. Pre and post data comparison revealed that there was a major decrease in negative social behavior. The following table clearly represents this finding.

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Social Conflict

Pre Assessment

Post Assessment

Percentage Decrease

Sharing

28

11

61%

Aggressive Behaviors Negative Words

11

2

82%

19

7

63%

Exclusion

13

4

69%

Analysis of the data reveals that each social conflict area decreased by at least 60% with aggressive behavior decreasing by 82%, leaving this area to see the most positive growth. Additionally, it was observed that the children were talking to each other and playing in a more positive way. Nice words, including compliments were used more often. Children also shared their feelings. More children were expressing exactly what they felt when conflicts arose. As a result of this improved independent behavior, I was able to provide more one-on-one attention to those children who were struggling in academic areas. Conclusion Being proactive in modeling, demonstrating and teaching social skills sooner rather than later proved to be effective in my classroom. As a result of the intervention described in this paper, my children became more successful with handling social interaction conflicts. I am very proud of the way they were able to not only listen to the lessons but to practice what they learned. As a result of the study, I have found that my time is now spent helping children who struggle with counting, writing their name, and drawing. Interruptions involving social conflicts are few and far between.

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I credit much of the success of this study to the fact that student comments were recorded on lists and displayed throughout the classroom. We, as a class, were able to visit these lists weekly. This repetitive strategy served to reinforce the social skills presented throughout the intervention. This year, I have seen my students mature in the area of social competence more rapidly than in previous years. Like Polland (2000) suggests, giving the children the tools necessary to make good choices in social settings earlier has proven to be effective. I am extremely proud of this intervention and it’s success, but I am most proud of my students for retaining and using the strategies given to them. Furthermore, my children continue to use positive social skills on a daily basis. The most rewarding aspect is when the children tell me how they use these strategies outside of the school setting. Almost everyday, a child volunteers a story of how they used a strategy with their brother, sister or friend when they are playing at home. Carrying these lessons outside of the classroom just emphasizes that social skills are not just for the classroom. These skills will carry them through the journey of life. Future Implications Building on the success of this intervention, my future plans are to implement the teaching of social competence at the beginning of the year rather than waiting until situations arise. Additionally, I plan to pre and post test my students to determine the effectiveness of my social skills improvement effort. I also intend to find additional resources to build a rich social skills curriculum. This study will be presented to my school’s Discipline Committee. Hopefully, study findings will help committee members realize that when given the skills, children

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will treat one another with greater respect.

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References Primary References

Nunnelley, J.C. (2002). Powerful, positive, and practical practices: Behavior guidance strategies. Southern Early Childhood Association Press. Knight, B.A., & Hughes, D. (1995). Developing social competence in the preschool years. Australian Journal of Early Childhood, 20(2), 13-19. Lawhon, T., & Lawhon, D. C. (2000). Promoting social skills in young children. Early Childhood Education, 28(2), 105-110. Polland, B. (2000) We Can Work It Out: Conflict Resolution for Children. Tricycle Press. Secondary References Kohler, F., & Strain, S. (1993). The early childhood social skills program. Teaching Exceptional Children, 25(2), 41-42. Emanoil, P. (2000). Control yourself. Human Ecology, 28(1), 8-10. Greenberg, P. (2001). When a child pesters others. Early Childhood Today, 15(6), 16. Connell, C.M., & Prinz, R. (2002). The impact of childcare and parent-child interactions on school readiness and social skills development for low-income African American children. Journal of School Psychology, 40(2), 177-193. Conroy, M., & et al. (1996). Suggestions for enhancing the social behaviors of preschoolers with disabilities using developmentally appropriate practices. Dimensions of Early Childhood, 24(1), 9-15. Kamps, D. & et al. (1995). Peer-inclusive social skills groups for young children with

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behavioral risks. Preventing School Failure, 39(4), 10-15. Lesson Plan References Henkes, K. (1991). Chrysanthemum. William Morrow & Company, Inc. Henkes, K. (1988). Chester’s Way. William Morrow & Company, Inc. Bedford, D. & Field, E. (2001). It’s my turn!. Little Tiger Press. Agassi, M. (2000) Hands Are Not For Hitting. Free Spirit Publishing, Inc. "How Does it Feel?" Getting Along. Wisconsin Public Television, Green Bay. Broadcast. Nov. 11, 2003.

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Appendices A-C Intervention Tools

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Social Behavior Recording Sheet Sharing

Aggressive Behavior

Negative Words/Phrases

Exclusion

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