Nov 4 Love that Lasts Ruth 1:1-18 One of the great stories of the Old Testament is the story of Ruth. We are going to be examining it for the next two weeks. Today we want to examine Ruth’s love for Naomi as an example of how you can create a love that last and endures many difficulties. Next week we will look at the legacy of that kind of committed love. We heard today the beginning of Ruth’s story. It starts with a famine in the land of Israel. As often happens, famine causes people to flee and Elimelech and Naomi and their two sons Chilion and Mahlon leave the area around Bethlehem and cross the river Jordan and find refuge in Moab. While there the boys grow up and marry local girls. Then tragedy strikes. All three of the men die, leaving Naomi very vulnerable. She is not only a widow but a refugee. She hears that rains have resumed around Bethlehem and so decides to return home. Her daughters-in-law, as was their duty, pack up and head out with Naomi. When they get to the border of Moab she releases them from the requirements of staying with her. She wants them to return to their homes, find new husbands and have a life, something she believed they would not have in Israel. Orpah listens to Naomi’s wise council and turn back. But Ruth refuses, and we have here one of the great passages of the Bible: “Do not press me to leave you or to turn back from following you! Where you go, I will go; where you lodge I will lodge; your people shall be my people and your God my God. Where you die, I will die—there will I be buried.” What would cause Ruth to say such things? What is the secret to finding and creating this kind of lasting love? Today I want to share some of my thoughts about this. I. A Love that Lasts Develops Through Loss Naomi and Ruth shared grief in the loss of their husbands. They had experienced other problems together. Naomi affirmed that Ruth had treated her kindly through these times of loss. No doubt these difficulties had strengthened the bond between Naomi and
Ruth. Naomi felt Ruth would lose even more if they stayed together. But “Ruth clung to her” and insisted on accompanying her mother-in-law back to Judah. No possible future loss could be as real to Ruth as losing the love of Naomi today. She had lost her husband; she would not lose Naomi. It has been my experience that love is refined in the crucible of loss. For some, experiencing loss or great disappointment reveals the flaws and cracks in the relationship that had always been there, but carefully hidden. When it happens, the loss and pain pushes them farther apart. But for many, going through difficult times deepens and transforms the love they have. They learn to depend upon one another and support one another emotionally and this transforms their relationship. This is what happened with Ruth and Naomi. Their relationship began as a forced one, daughter-in-law to mother-in-law. But over time, through tragic deaths it had become so much more. Now the thought of losing Naomi and that support was more than Ruth could bear. We do not need to put down Orpah for going back. Sharing tragedies, as I said, do not automatically create deep bonds but it seems to me almost impossible for those bonds to happen without the crisis. A man writes: My wife and I grieved the loss of our first child. But from the grief came a stronger love for each other. A love that can endure anything develops through loss, if you are willing to seek the other’s best welfare rather than selfishly continue to nurture the grief. So when you are going through a difficult time celebrate the people who are really there for you, supporting you and nurturing you. Don’t push them away but see in their care a gift of grace from God that is given to support you in the moment and how it is building a firm foundation for the future. II. A Love That Lasts Grows Through Commitment Pollster George Barna describes our time as an age of decreased commitment. Authentic love involves commitment. Ruth’s willingness to stay with Naomi, to actually place herself in a very difficult and possibly dangerous situation is a measure of
commitment. Why do I say dangerous? She was now going to be the foreign woman in Naomi’s village. Would she be treated with respect or as an outsider? Would she and Naomi find enough to eat? Would Naomi’s house be available to them after her being gone for so long? There were more questions than answers as they stood at the border but Ruth was committed. Her words show us just how much. . “Where you go, I will go.” Love requires little to satisfy. She is willing to trust Naomi. “Where you lodge, I will lodge.” Love will adjust. We don’t know the future but we will do it together. “Your people shall be my people.” Love looks forward and not back. She wasn’t going to resent what she gave up but instead fully embrace what is to come. “Where you die, I will die,—there will I be buried.” Love is forever. It is tough to be committed. I want everyone to know I am not speaking against those who have had to make a difficult choice to not continue a relationship, whether that was a marriage or a friendship. There are many reasons for ending a relationship and many of them are valid. But if we are talking about a love that last it has to be built on the basis that you are committed to one another. Even if the relationship ends it has to be worked on with the idea of permanence or it is already doomed. I see the concept of committed love lived out in so many ways; spouses taking loving care of their mates, children supporting parents, friends being there for one another through thick and thin. Ruth’s story is a story that challenges us to work on all of our relationships and figure out how to be more committed to them. III. A Love That Lasts Comes from Faith The last thing to realize is that we cannot create this kind of lasting love on our own. It is only possible through faith. As we pray to God, the source of all love, we will find the strength to get through the times of loss supporting one another and being committed to one another. Ruth alludes to this in the ending of her words. Ruth says, “Your God, my God….May the Lord to thus and so to me and more as well if even death parts me from you!” Naomi’s Lord became Ruth’s Lord. The fruit of the Spirit is love. Truly spiritual people have great capacity to love. Jesus said others would recognize his disciples by the love they have for one another.
Paul writes, “And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love” (1 Cor. 13:13). Authentic love lasts. It is born in difficulty, it is nourished in commitment and it grows in faith. In all of our different relationships we are on various points in the journey to authentic love. We certainly do not wish difficulties on anyone just so the relationship will deepen, but we can pray often for ways to make the relationship that nurture us better and we can continually pledge to be committed and bathe the whole experience in prayer. If so we will make it through the rough times and find true authentic love. In closing let me share one story. As a woman was dying she said to her friend, “Take care of my girls.” This woman knew her husband was a good man but not up to all the struggles related to raising four girls. The friend agreed. Over the next decade she has been there for the girls doing all those things that a mom would usually do. It has been time consuming. But she had made a commitment and she would stick with it. She prayed daily for the strength and through this tragedy she has formed a bond with these girls that will last, I am sure, a lifetime. As for Ruth she goes with Naomi to Bethlehem. It is harvest time. We leave you with a picture of her gleaning in the fields. One who has made commitments that she believes will be of help to Naomi but likely eliminate any real future for her is about to find out that God is at work in her and Naomi’s life. More about that next week.
